Faith In His Timing

   Okay, so I will not lie to you, these past few weeks have been pretty rough for me. School has been more difficult, I really miss being home and being with my family (it was seriously so great to see them a bit ago), and I have been feeling all together anxious.

   Add on the fact that I have been not so patiently waiting for a mission call and it just sounds fun, right?

   I submitted my papers about a month ago and I still have not been assigned anywhere, I don't have my call, and in all honesty, I am getting a little frustrated. This past week, three of my friends (a roommate and my sister included) have gotten their mission calls, so I couldn't help thinking "Why not me? Why haven't I gotten mine yet?" 

   I have been working hard to read my scriptures more often, I have been writing in a journal, I have been going to church and trying to stay positive even though sometimes I feel like I am drowning. I have been doing what everyone advised me to do to prepare for a mission, so, why hasn't my call come yet?

   Then I remembered a quote I saw once on Pinterest, spoken by Neal A. Maxwell. "Faith in the Lord includes faith in His timing."

   I have faith in the Lord, in His timing, even though I don't always understand it. 

   I am one of those people who like to know the plans, I need to know the plans or I start freaking out. I have my life planned out for at least the next five years, maybe the next ten. I know what I want in life and I know how to get it. I like being in control of my life. But this is not something I can control.

   The Lord, Heavenly Father, knows what I need, and He knows when I need it. There is a divine plan for me, and I know that up to this point, everything in my life has happened for a reason, and I am so thankful for that. I know that I am going to learn something from waiting what seems like a lifetime to learn where I will be able to serve the Lord for 18-months, but it is hard. 

   I guess part of me has felt that it was my fault that it was taking longer than I had expected, that I had done something wrong in the papers or in life, or maybe it was because I never learned how to ride a bike. But someone very close to me hugged me and said "They are just taking extra time with you to make sure where you go is where you are meant to go, because you are so special."

   Elder Dallin H. Oaks once said "Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ prepares you for whatever life brings." Yes, life can be crazy. Sometimes, I feel like every time I make a plan for my life, Heavenly Father is chuckling at me, going "Oh no, that is definitely not how that is going to happen, but good try!". We cannot always predict what happens in life, and even when we can, it is still hard. Life is hard, and tiring, and draining, and stressful, but if we have faith in the Lord, He will help us through all things. 

   I hope everyone has an amazing week! I will let you all know when my mission call comes!

xoxo Sydney